I am at an airport again, phone off, headphones on, thinking of sweet things to pick up for dear friends. It feels good -- this feeling of being zippered out of my life for a while, but keeping the zipper attached so I can fit myself back in. Maybe.
It is more accurate, I think, to say I am starting to feel like a trampoline gymnast. I do touch down, land, and land, and land again -- because gravity needs me to. But the real work, the real beauty and flight happens between the landings. The sins and flips, the turns, the mesmerizing views of a body spinning in space. This arc up and then down -- that is where the real life is happening. the landings are points to regroup, gather strength and pull on what I learned in my last flight before I launch myself again.
This. This is the life I want. A trampoline life. And if someday I can do it all while holding the hand of someone who loves to fly almost as much as he loves me -- all the better.
But right now, this moment-- I am breathing into this moment and the freedom of being so much on my own. No plans but those I make. No need to answer to anyone unless I choose to. It is the up side of loneliness -- this freedom. I am arcing down from my latest flight, having changed and expanded while I was in the in air, glancing down I see my base gently moving towards me. I will sink into it with gratitude and collect all my energy until I am ready for the next jump.
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